Writing Sample
Microcopy & error messages, before and after
The three case studies show the strategy. This page is just the sentences: the small, easy-to-get-wrong UI text that decides whether someone finishes a task or calls support. Specimens below are drawn from patterns I've written and rewritten across federal, healthcare, and e-commerce-style flows, restated here without client-confidential specifics.
Error Messages
Before
"Error: Invalid input. Please try again."
After
"That doesn't look like a valid email. Check for a typo after the @."
Before
"An unexpected error has occurred. Please contact your administrator."
After
"Something broke on our end, not yours. Try again in a minute. Still stuck? Contact support."
Button Labels
Before
"Submit"
After
"Send my request"
Before
"Yes" / "No" (on a dialog asking whether to delete an account)
After
"Delete my account" / "Keep my account"
Empty States
Before
"No results found."
After
"No appointments match those filters. Try widening the date range, or clear filters to see everything."
Status Messages
Before
"Your request is being processed."
After
"We've got your request. Most take under 24 hours, and we'll email you the second it's done."
What Changed
The before-versions are written for the system. The after-versions are written for a person reading under stress: the moment something failed, or they're not sure they clicked the right button, or they're staring at a blank screen wondering if it's broken. The fix is usually fewer words: name the actual thing that happened and the next step.
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